Empty today

I am feeling very empty today. I really want to help my husband and I can't. He is worrying himself to death over the bills...Being without my pay is a huge loss for us. I need to find a way to bring in some kind of income while I am in career limbo.  I feel so horrible about our situation. I know it is all my fault.

I have so many things just out of my reach at this point. I am so frustrated! I don't know what to do. I am getting pretty desperate.

I really wanted to take this opportunity to make a change in my life..but all I am doing is selling myself to the first retail store that will take me. I am better than this. I have been a hard ass strong Manager that deserves to be fought over not me groveling.

I don't really want much....I want a job that I feel good about, that I can dress nice and be appreciated. A place that I enjoy going to everyday, somewhere that I can make a difference. Is what I am wanting unrealistic? I don't want anything handed to me...I will work for it. I am a hard worker, really I am. I have always put everything I have into my job.

I will continue my search and pray that the new door will open soon.....hopefully before we are out on the streets:(

I am so empty inside........................